My Sense of Individuality (Passages)

Jacob Sutton

Dr. Mirskin



From the very beginning, this section of Passages really struck a chord in me.  Right at the start, Sheehy begins talking about finding and developing our own sense of individuality.

"With the debut of the first separate sense of self about the age of two, we are endowed with an extraordinary gift: the makings of our own individuality".

Excuse me?  Are you saying that since I was just a baby, I was beginning to find my sense of self?  It's insane to think that, subconsciously we have all been trying to distinguish ourselves from those close to us (aka our parents and loved ones) throughout our whole entire lives.  However for a very long part of my life, my Merger Self would take over, attaching me to my parents and making me scared of letting go.  Maybe it was my anxiety, love for my parents or sensitivity, but for some reason I just found it hard to WANT to distinguish myself from my parents.

Now, onto high school.  This was where my Seeker Self finally came into play.  In high school, I was surrounded by likeminded young artists who were, like me, exploring themselves.  Not only was high school a place (for everyone to) start to find myself, but it was a chance for me to create.  I feel like the fact that I went to a performing arts high school helped me in my journey of creating who I am.  I began to find a balance of still being very close to my family while also starting MY OWN journeys.

I feel like many people struggle with balancing their Merger and Seeker Selves out.  It is easy for our Merger and Seeker selves to constantly be at battle.  A lot of people are either very dependent on their parents and are very attached, or are very focused on being completely independent from their family.  I feel that it is extremely important to find a balance between our two selves, in order to find who we really are.

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